Justin Bieber To Play Luke Skywalker???
OK, so I haven’t really bought into this whole 2012 “the world is gonna end” Mayan shit. But this news has me rethinking the impending apocalypse. When I started this site, I never thought I’d be doing an article on Justin fucking Bieber, but how do you ignore this? People have complained that George Lucas has been butchering the Star Wars franchise ever since Return of the Jedi came out. Numerous bad decisions on his part have had people clamoring for his exit from the Star Wars franchise. Fans have long since begged for Lucas to let someone else take the reigns and get what many believe to be the best franchise ever, back on track.
I would agree that he’s made some pretty damn atrocious decisions when it comes to the prequel trilogy, but in the back of my mind I’ve always thought to myself, there would be NO Star Wars if he hadn’t crafted the beautiful if imperfect universe in his own imagination. So I’ve always tended to give GL a bit of a pass more than other hardcore Star Wars fans but I think I can finally subscribe to the theory that the old man is bat shit fucking crazy.
So not only are they rebooting a movie that should be 100% UN-REBOOTABLE, but they’re getting JUSTIN BIEBER to star as Luke Skywalker??? The studio has already begun to leak promotional images of Bieber as the Jedi-in-training (before they called them fucking Padawans), and hopes to have the rest of the cast filled shortly. The studio hopes that having mega star Justin Bieber in the lead role will help the franchise appeal to a younger generation that may have missed out on Star Wars completely.
In an interview with The Atlanta Journal-Constitution, Bieber seemed to be excited about the prospect of taking on the role of the world’s most famous Jedi, even though he didn’t appear to know much about the franchise.
Shoot me now. I can’t believe this shit is happening. Who’s going to play Han Solo? Why don’t you just COMPLETELY ruin my life and make it one of those fucking Jonas Brothers. Doesn’t matter much which one does it? Don’t even get me started on the rest of the potential cast of this cluster fuck in the making. Maybe Miley Cyrus as Princess Leia? Or how about Taylor Swift? Fuck it, who cares. Let’s see how terrible they can make this shit show.